The Shitty Fifty Freeroll

:as :ad :ah :ac

So I decided to go try out the NL game at Rama yesterday. I was going to take the whole day off but in the morning I decided to go to work and just take the afternoon off. I run a wastewater treatment plant - yes, the shit plant. So, on my morning rounds I find a $50 bill on one of the screening units, stuck right in the poo. I remove it and clean it thoroughly(you cannot get that smell out!). I then take the shitty fifty to Tim Hortons and buy the guys a coffee and I am left with a free $40 min buy-in at Rama. I play a 10 hour session (filled with college kids blowing their student loans) and cash out for $541. With the $501 profit I bought in for the $300 tournament on the 28th, gave the wife $100, and spent the rest on a bag of goodies for myself.

So, we'll see if the shitty fifty freeroll keeps on rollin on the 28th!

Comments

  • KRT wrote:
    So, we'll see if the shitty fifty freeroll keeps on rollin on the 28th!
    Nice day - good luck in the tourney!
  • KRT –

    On the weekend I accidentally ingested a $50 bill, I was holding it up for the waitress when I saw the most beautiful woman ever (yes guys, a woman) she took my breath away – and the vacuum effect from this occurrence sucked the $50 bill right down my throat!!!! A million to one shot.

    I am happy to hear that you found it and that is has paid such great dividends for you.

    But, please return.

    Thanks
  • :as :ad :ac :ah

    Trevor - thank you sir.

    CamelToeLick - a stripper is not a waitress.
  • hah, awesome story, I hope it works out. I wonder, would you have made all the same plays during your session if you had bought in with your own money, and more of it? interesting thought, thinking that the fact that you found it in poo changed your play ever-so-slightly, such that you came out further ahead than you would have it it was not poomoney.
  • If there's an E-coli breakout in the Barrie region soon...
  • Just curious.. which Tim Horton's was it... The shitty effects of the poo money could be felt far and wide...

    Here's how I see it:

    The cashier, gets the shittyness on her hands from touching your money, and over the course of the day touches 100s of bills when giving people change, so they will now carry as smaller version of the shittyness outside the Timmys, and continue to spread the shittyness through the town, and in smaller and small doses eventually everyone has had the shittyness and will now pass on the shittyness to their children. Now let's jump back to the time of purchase, so inside the Timmy's again, that cashier finishes your sale, and heads to the back, where she meets up with the donut cook, Leroy, and they head to the coatroom. 30 seconds later, sorry Leroy, but you know it's true, they emerge, She comes out smiling, he comes out dazed. Now Leroy has the shittyness spread pretty much across his entire body, and it is his turn to carry the shittyness.

    Here's Leroy's story...

    Leroy minding his own business, blowing his nose on his sleeve, and and sneezing into his hands of course, and making those yummy donuts in the back of the aforementioned Timmys, like he always does. When he sees Gertrude, the 70 year old cashier come through the doors from the cash area. A fear crosses his face like a water hitting those ppl on the Trident Splash commercials when he sees her, he knows its time again. Of course he has no choice, since it was part of the deal they made when she bailed him out of jail. SO like always the head to the coatroom. 15 minutes later, according to Leroy, she may be old; but he has a rep to keep up, they emerge. She comes out smiling, he comes out dazed. He feels a little shitty... like perhaps some shittyness has been passed onto him from Gertrude. He continues to work though, because he needs the 3.40 an hour. He spends the rest of the day handling the donuts, with his usual unwashed hands, and with each one he touches, he feels a little less shitty. By the end of the day he is feeling back to normal, and trying hard not to think about the coatroom, or the shittyness. Little does he know he has drastically contributed to the overall shittyness of his shitty little town.

    Anyone else think I need help? :'(

    soo... which Tim Horton's?
  • Between TNorth's request for the return of his accidentally swallowed money, the use of the term "poomoney", and the tale of Leroy, this thread has to be one of the funniest I've seen on here.

    I don't think "poomoney" will ever not be funny to me.
  • :as :ad :ac :ah

    Mom always said:

    "Get that money out of your mouth! It's dirty and you don't know where it's been!"

    She was right.
  • I was at the brass rail in toronto and put a 5 in a girls g-string...i wonder what timmi's she went too..haha
  • djalikool wrote:
    I was at the brass rail in toronto and put a 5 in a girls g-string...i wonder what timmi's she went too..haha
    Did you brush your teeth and gargle afterwards?
  • what table/limit did you start out at Rama? I'm planning on going there next week. Want to play 1/2 no-limit.
  • You mean 1/2 poo-limit?
  • Hmmm, I was at a Timmy's in Barrie the other day. I ordered a large w/ cream and a sour dough glazed. I just left Rama, so I paid with a 100 dollar bill. Among my change was a $50 note that seemed to be a little tinted. Hmmm, I wonder...

    I'm burning my wallet as of now.
  • I haven't been to Rama in a while..... I guess I"m just shit free...... not really but this thread has been hillarious.
  • moose wrote:
    You mean 1/2 poo-limit?

    I prefer Pooh-Limit Omaha.
  • New rule at all my tourneys: no buying in with poomoney. I'm looking at you DrTyore.

    /g2
  • :as :ad :ac :ah

    The freeroll has ended. :'(

    I made the final table of 11 at the Rama tourney on the 28th. :D
    Finished 10th - only top 7 paid. :rage:
    Shit. :'(:'(
  • KRT wrote:

    Shit. :'(:'(

    lol :)
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