Diarrhea tourney breakdown story

So here is just a little quick story about Diarrhea and tournament play....they do not go hand in hand (no pun intended). I for one, was unfortunate enough to learn this lesson 3 places from the money after playing about 5 hours of tournament poker and a 15 minute break had just finished. I had convinced myself that I feel fine, and that I really wouldnt have a major urge to hit the porcelain until the tourney was finished...about 1 and a half hours until end of tourney play by my estimates (Note to self: Diarrhea has the tendency to make your thinking and vision blurred and hinder your ability to make rational decisions or operate anything mechanical or electrical, proceed with caution)...

So comming off the break i have less than the average chip stack and need to make some critical decisions since the blinds will kill me in just a few orbits, and thinking I feel "good", I take another careful sip from my water bottle as I sit down at my seat. So i get pocket sixes in middle position...normally I would fold and I did not want to play this hand at all considering my strategy, size of the stacks at the table, and how aggressive and loose these players were (yes this was at riverrock, lol)..so as the play comes to me...BAM!!! It hits me like a sledgehammer!!!...im caught and I dont know what to do!! I have to go to the bathroom at all costs, even if it means just running out fo the tourney right there!! I get delusional and dizzy..i start spinning as my buttocks clench up, I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM! I quickly have to throw All-in with my pocket 6's..and swiftly get called by pocket K's and pocket Q's behind me. queen hits the board!! I SIGH IN RELIEF!! IM OUT!! I quickly run to the bathroom, running over everything in my path , I have the stall in my sites..yes! there it is, I see it! I dive for the door, so noone can get there foot in before me! I just make it. I frantically try and put together some sort of barrier to seperate me from the casino toilet...after an exhausting 30 seconds ive finally put together a makeshift cushion which i dont even sit on (its just extra in case), so I just drop the bomb..ahh err hardly a bomb ...it was like taking a stinky piss...I think heard the tourney director calling out the top three places about an hour later as i still hovered there....

So after I finally finish. I get a nice thigh work out, and feel much better...I was a little bitter that I had just missed the money by 3 places...But most importantly I realized that, I am never drinking the tap water from riverrock ever again!!!! And after thinking about it more closely I knew, that this was my culprit, riverock tapwater!! everytime i went to get a refill the girl would just use the tap water.. S***....oh well, Ill get em next time, and im bringing a case of water too!!!! Costco here I come!

Comments

  • Next time, take the Tussin'
  • Shit happens.

    ScottyZ
  • ScottyZ wrote:
    Shit happens.

    ScottyZ
    lmfao :D

    sorry Anton81 :frown:
  • Its okay, i found myself laughing about the whole thing shortly after, no big deal, theres always another tourney
  • omg that was funny. right up there with amy's recent post. i'm surprised immodium, preparation h and depends don't sponsor the wpt
  • Anton: are you playing the tourney tomorrow night ( $90 + 10 freeze out) ?
  • Anton,
    your resistance was legandary!!!!!!
    Sorry for your loss. (both of them!) :tongue:

    I heard an awful rumor that the secuirty people at Casino Niagara or Fallsview caught some eldery lady taking a #2 in a cup because she didn't want to leave her slot machine!!! :eek:
    Eeeeeew!!!!
    At least you held it in!!!!!!

    Good luck with your next tourament!

    JohnnieH
  • Josh FP wrote:
    Anton: are you playing the tourney tomorrow night ( $90 + 10 freeze out) ?

    Naw I dont think so...not yet, i am however gearing up for a major tounrey run and going to start hitting them on a more daily basis. Im probably going to pass the next couple weeks though
    JohnnieH wrote:
    I heard an awful rumor that the secuirty people at Casino Niagara or Fallsview caught some eldery lady taking a #2 in a cup because she didn't want to leave her slot machine!!!

    hahaha Thats nasssssty!!!
  • Anton81 wrote:
    Naw I dont think so...not yet, i am however gearing up for a major tounrey run and going to start hitting them on a more daily basis. Im probably going to pass the next couple weeks though
    Here's hoping you can get your shit together in time. :eek:
  • hahahaha^...im never going to hear the end of the shit jokes now!! hahaha
  • JohnnieH wrote:

    I heard an awful rumor that the secuirty people at Casino Niagara or Fallsview caught some eldery lady taking a #2 in a cup because she didn't want to leave her slot machine!!! :eek:

    JohnnieH

    BF Skinner showed through his behavioural conditioning experiements that it was indeed possible, to turn humans into crack-addicted monkeys.

    P.S. on a serious note - if you were in a "serious money" game, would you shit your pants and just play on?

    I understand that "serious money" is a relative term but I'm more interested in the fear-factor element.
  • I've heard from casino workers that 'certain' slot machine players will wear diapers. They don't want to leave their machines when they are about to pay off! I believe esool is wearing one of last year's models in his avatar...

    Ain't no amount of money worth shitting my pants over. Just don't eat 3 days before a big money game.
  • I always wondered about that diaper pic... it reminded me of Diaper Bob on a Jerry Springer show ( the guy "got off" on wearing diapers, even in public, it was the funniest thing to see the irate father of Diaper Bob chastise Bob saying, "don't wear that diaper and visit my place of work!!!" )

    Ahhhh God Bless America
  • He wore diapers outside of his clothes? wow, that's funny...
  • Anton81 wrote:
    hahahaha^...im never going to hear the end of the shit jokes now!! hahaha
    lololol :D
  • no he just wore diapers, period !

    some people have that as a fetish...
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