The American Border, a TR
My first inclination was to fill a page with simply:
"FUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFU"
But I think it is an interesting story, hopefully you'll get an indignant laugh and we can all join together and hate them. :h:
1st crossing: Sault Ste. Marie
Walleye and I stopped to visit an Aunt before driving to MN..we pull up to the border hand over our passport and the guard literally does a double take at seeing an American and a Canadian in the car together. He asks a couple snotty questions and then sends us to park in a garage so they can inspect the contents of our vehicle.
We're told to go sit in an office where the agents have apparently not realised that this is 2010 NOT 1812. I'm yelled at and told that I have to stand at a counter and may not look at or talk to anybody. They give Walleye a chair and compliment him on his dog and talk nicely about the weather. The constable proceeds to harrass me for an hour and a half and then gives me a "Conditional Visa" telling me that they're sending troopers to Walleye's house if I don't return this paper on the date I said I would.
Fuck you very much, and we're off.
This is a good time to mention that last official 'trouble' I was in was 11 years ago when I received a speeding ticket. (presuming you don't count my view that $15 is a fair price to pay to park where ever you want downtown.) I'm hardly a 'red flag' raiser, in honesty I was actually shocked and felt a bit violated by being treated so openly like a second-rate citizen.
We return on time, hand back the paper stand there for another 20 minutes while a guard apparently types his life story and head home to Canada for a few days.
2nd Crossing: Sarnia
The border appears to be busy, which is encouraging...but again we hand over a Canadian and an American Passport and the guard immediately radios and sends us in.
*sigh*
At least this time we're better prepared, the first guard had been upset that I wasn't travelling with a copy of my lease (which I'm sure you all do
) Or some info about when I'm going back to the U.S. I had brought both this time. We sit there for about three hours in an office, fill out some forms for them and then are informed that I am being denied entry because I couldn't show sufficient ties to Canada. (Kindly note that the previous time I showed NO ties to Canada)
I spend the next hour being fingerprinted, having my photo taken and being told that if I don't allow them to do this they can and will barr me from the country for 5 years.
Walleye and I head back to my place and call a lawyer to figure out wtf just happened.
His advice: "Get married, and don't try to cross the border again for any reason until you are and have an alien relative visa" about 3 months to a year.
I lose it..for no reason other than one border guards insane belief that I'm going to abandon my family, my home, all my belongings..I now cannot even walk over to Seneca for an afternoon and am facing a shotgun wedding.
3rd crossing: Walleye, an american citizen in Sarnia
After bringing me back, he has 22 hours to make a 16 hour drive by himself and get to work, but you'd think an American going to American wouldn't have many problems..
WRONG
They stop him and question him for over an hour while they tear his overnight bag apart, lest I be a contortionist and hiding out in it.
I knew my parent's insistance on naming me Kristy "Death2AmericanInfidels" Sea was going to bite me in the ass some day.
and so I say:
YouTube - Fuck the Police
"FUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFUFU"
But I think it is an interesting story, hopefully you'll get an indignant laugh and we can all join together and hate them. :h:
1st crossing: Sault Ste. Marie
Walleye and I stopped to visit an Aunt before driving to MN..we pull up to the border hand over our passport and the guard literally does a double take at seeing an American and a Canadian in the car together. He asks a couple snotty questions and then sends us to park in a garage so they can inspect the contents of our vehicle.
We're told to go sit in an office where the agents have apparently not realised that this is 2010 NOT 1812. I'm yelled at and told that I have to stand at a counter and may not look at or talk to anybody. They give Walleye a chair and compliment him on his dog and talk nicely about the weather. The constable proceeds to harrass me for an hour and a half and then gives me a "Conditional Visa" telling me that they're sending troopers to Walleye's house if I don't return this paper on the date I said I would.
Fuck you very much, and we're off.
This is a good time to mention that last official 'trouble' I was in was 11 years ago when I received a speeding ticket. (presuming you don't count my view that $15 is a fair price to pay to park where ever you want downtown.) I'm hardly a 'red flag' raiser, in honesty I was actually shocked and felt a bit violated by being treated so openly like a second-rate citizen.
We return on time, hand back the paper stand there for another 20 minutes while a guard apparently types his life story and head home to Canada for a few days.
2nd Crossing: Sarnia
The border appears to be busy, which is encouraging...but again we hand over a Canadian and an American Passport and the guard immediately radios and sends us in.
*sigh*
At least this time we're better prepared, the first guard had been upset that I wasn't travelling with a copy of my lease (which I'm sure you all do
) Or some info about when I'm going back to the U.S. I had brought both this time. We sit there for about three hours in an office, fill out some forms for them and then are informed that I am being denied entry because I couldn't show sufficient ties to Canada. (Kindly note that the previous time I showed NO ties to Canada)I spend the next hour being fingerprinted, having my photo taken and being told that if I don't allow them to do this they can and will barr me from the country for 5 years.
Walleye and I head back to my place and call a lawyer to figure out wtf just happened.
His advice: "Get married, and don't try to cross the border again for any reason until you are and have an alien relative visa" about 3 months to a year.
I lose it..for no reason other than one border guards insane belief that I'm going to abandon my family, my home, all my belongings..I now cannot even walk over to Seneca for an afternoon and am facing a shotgun wedding.
3rd crossing: Walleye, an american citizen in Sarnia
After bringing me back, he has 22 hours to make a 16 hour drive by himself and get to work, but you'd think an American going to American wouldn't have many problems..
WRONG
They stop him and question him for over an hour while they tear his overnight bag apart, lest I be a contortionist and hiding out in it.
I knew my parent's insistance on naming me Kristy "Death2AmericanInfidels" Sea was going to bite me in the ass some day.
and so I say:
YouTube - Fuck the Police
Comments
Oh, and I know you're offended at the idea, but even if you were willing, getting married wouldn't do much. My cousin went to University in the US, met a guy, married him, had a baby, and still couldn't cross the border - all the while trying to get visas, etc. Took about 2.5 years in total. Even when the baby was in the US, he (baby) was allowed to cross but she wasn't. And when she finally was allowed to go to the US, she wasn't allowed back in Canada for some ridiculous amount of time (1-2 years; can't remember).
Congrats! Have you set a date?
Seriously though my immediate thought when seeing title and post was....
tl/dr - Americans in position of power including guns and badges = assbags
EZ game.
You want to talk about the Stone age - try actually having custody of your kids and getting a passport for them AND crossing the border with them.
Crossing at Niagara/Buffalo to get to Minnesota= -EV
Well yeah, that goes without saying. Just pointing out how much they seem to not care about who crosses or why.
April 1st. "Fool's day" seems appropriate.
The lady at the office neither appreciated my calling Walleye 'Dad' while she read out the part about not marrying one's cousin, uncle, father, brother etc...nor did she heed my request to change our names to Mohammed and Abdulla Shabazz (<--last name to be said with Jazz hands)
It will still probably take 3-6 months to sort this out.
I'm always totally paranoid when I cross the boarder. Hate it. Nothing bad has happened except for the time I forgot to take of my belt and the wand went off over my crotch area......I have piercings in odd places and (forgetting about the belt) thought I was going to have to drop trow at Newark Airport.
Luckily the guards there were ultra polite. and I just had to remove my shoes/belt and let them recheck me.
Shitty experience KS. Hope it works out better
I'm sure you could take these apart and put in a white goldfish.
WOMANS ZEBRA GOLD FISH TANK GO GO COSTUME BOOTS MD 7-8 - eBay (item 310184117441 end time Mar-23-10 16:59:57 PDT)
Pure class
hot.
My Brother-in-Law happens to have the same first and last name as a fugitive who is on the "DETAIN" list (or whatever the fuck they call it) at the US/Canada border. For a period of 2.5 years he would get asked to step out of his vehicle by the US guards, handcuffed, brought into the building and detained, until they determined that he was not the guy they were looking for, as he:
a) had a different middle initial than the fugitive, and
b) was not CAUCASIAN, like the fugitive.
This was a weekly occurrence as his son was the starting Keeper for the UB soccer team. It also continued despite his receipt of a letter from the US Justice Dept., AND the OPP stating he was not the guy they were looking for. Favourite quote, "You expect me to believe those letters are real?"
I dislike anyone with a badge. And from a Law and Order type like me, it takes a lot to move me to that position. Good luck to you both in getting this resolved . . .
Jesse Ventura is a complete . . . what's the technical term? . . . right . . .
WHACK-A-DOODLE.
You get a pass because Kristy thinks you're cuddly, but be careful, bucko . . .
post of the year and i wish the story ended with this.
did you say they wouldn't let you back in your own country for 5 years.
i got hauled into a room and interrogated aggressively (mild aggressive?) for an hour before i convinced him to not hold me from losing my flight. my martial arts instructor travels back and forth a lot and told me to get half cut before i go through not sure if it would really help....
Watch it there buddy.
Jesse may have been a great heel, and a better than average talking head, but the Agent Orange and the steroids have finally dissolved what remained of his grey matter. Watch him closely on Larry King, or whatever . . . he is starting to show those little "tremors" that Ali began to manifest when his Parkinson's kicked in.