My night with the Swedish Hero
Barg: I went home with him last night.
Things seemed to be going pretty well, we talked, had a bit too much to drink..I was afraid that I wasn't going to be up to his obviously amazing standards, and that he wouldn't bestow upon me his wonder-seed.
However finally he said "bed time" and at first I thought I'd be sleeping on the couch..but to my elation he said "don't be dumb, My Mom's gonna be up any minute- you can sleep with me downstairs"
Let me spoil this for you right now...
IT WAS EVERYTHING I EVER DREAMED IT COULD BE!
He lead me downstairs, stopping only for a moment in the kitchen to say good morning to his Mom. Once in her basement, his 'love den' he laid me gently in the bed..and then he did something no man has EVER done for me before..
...he pulled out his nunchucks and showed me his moves..
I was obviously overwhelmed by his prowess..he climbed into bed with me and the he showed me something from his own personal Kama Sutra.. the Half Nelson of love. He asked me to pull the plug out on his bed side light, because the switch was broken ..and the rest is history.
[x] came
I woke up this morning, we engaged in some mild karate related afterplay and he showed me his Johnny Cash action figure. Then I was plied liberally with instant coffee and his Mom's macaroni and cheese.
Things seemed to be going pretty well, we talked, had a bit too much to drink..I was afraid that I wasn't going to be up to his obviously amazing standards, and that he wouldn't bestow upon me his wonder-seed.
However finally he said "bed time" and at first I thought I'd be sleeping on the couch..but to my elation he said "don't be dumb, My Mom's gonna be up any minute- you can sleep with me downstairs"
Let me spoil this for you right now...
IT WAS EVERYTHING I EVER DREAMED IT COULD BE!
He lead me downstairs, stopping only for a moment in the kitchen to say good morning to his Mom. Once in her basement, his 'love den' he laid me gently in the bed..and then he did something no man has EVER done for me before..
...he pulled out his nunchucks and showed me his moves..
I was obviously overwhelmed by his prowess..he climbed into bed with me and the he showed me something from his own personal Kama Sutra.. the Half Nelson of love. He asked me to pull the plug out on his bed side light, because the switch was broken ..and the rest is history.
[x] came
I woke up this morning, we engaged in some mild karate related afterplay and he showed me his Johnny Cash action figure. Then I was plied liberally with instant coffee and his Mom's macaroni and cheese.
Comments
[x] Destroyed the cash game
[x] won the fuck out off Rock Band
[x] bedded the Swedish icon
That love child of yours will be destined for greatness of a whole.....nutha.....level.
PS. Be thankful he didn't show you the Full Nelson of love....there are no known survivors. Only slightly less worse is the Father Nelson.
But then he figured this out and took another step ahead
Mark is Swedish?
Although the part highlighted in red confused me
except that night with Mark: I fit in perfectly
This slander on the Hero and his nubile consort cannot go unchallenged. I throw down the gauntlet, sir . . .
Everyone knows the Hero likes to pitch, rather than catch.
Hobbes: I considered highlights..but you wouldn't 'cliff notes' the bible would you? People got to read about the cumming of christ in full.
I've stolen this nick and referred to myself as it, at least three times
I will battle you to the death for his seed. :mad:
The Swedish Hero in FULL awesome garb:
But how do I resolve the Coal Miner's gear? Surely our Hero would be more sensitive to the environment . . .
UMM WAT :mad:
Get nunchucks immediately!
gogogogog
at first i was like
then i was like