(416): He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
(510): i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
(602): and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
crying game/..... - (506): No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Wish I could take complete credit, but my nympho friend found it. Still trying to figure out if she found it because of something sent to her... or something she sent...
Wish I could take complete credit, but my nympho friend found it. Still trying to figure out if she found it because of something sent to her... or something she sent...
Comments
Part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. It's tragic.
(708): I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
(985): I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
(215): you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
(843): Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
(248): I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
(512): My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
(248): ya dads aren't the best wingmen
(303): Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
(510): i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
(602): and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
crying game/..... - (506): No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
very funny find sir
Solid brag
(+44): You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
(858): the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Laughed out loud.
(623): she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.