You are the worst fucking poker player EVER!

pkrfce9pkrfce9
in General Poker Chat
I heard this comment at a crazy 1/2 1k max poker game on the weekend. These guys all knew each other well so nothing but a heated debate came of it but I could see this leading to a fight in other circumstances.

It was after a friend made a questionable but defensible play. Funny thing is, the person making the comment made a far worse play IMO.

I could see my friend was getting a bit upset with this so I quietly told him his play 'spoke for itself'. Which I guess you could interpret any way you like. I didn't say anything to the other player as I saw no benefit in giving him any free advice plus he's not the kind of guy to ever think he would be wrong. Kind of like trigs.

What other dumb stuff have you heard said at the table? If it is directed at you, what did you say? What if it is directed at one of your friends?

Discuss.

tapatalk puts this here to annoy YOU

Comments

  • moosemoose
    "Leprechauns stole some of my chips."

    Player taking to TD after a tourney break was over at Caesar's LV
  • BlondeFishBlondeFish
    pkrfce9 wrote: »
    What other dumb stuff have you heard said at the table?
    Too many dumb stuff I've heard, but here's a few.

    - But it was sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooted!
    - I called the raise with 2-3 because I had a gut feeling.
    - I'm the unluckiest player in the world! (says THOUSANDS of losing players)
    - Do all you chipleaders want to donate to the bubble boy prize? :rolleyes:
    - Who cares about the high rake? You get "free" drinks and food.
    - Who cares about the 30% withholding tax? You always get it back LEGALLY. :bs:
    - It's rigged! (says the losing player about online, Woodbine, or anywhere else he can't win)
    If it is directed at you, what did you say?
    After I win a big pot, I've gotten a lot of
    - "You are the LUCKIEST f***ing poker player EVER!
    - "You are such a Bingo player!"
    - "How could you call that?!" (After a triple barrel bluff, then whines to all his friends in the poker room that I'm a fish for making the correct call.)

    I avoid refuting their misreads as I want it to last as long as possible.
  • MiloMilo
    Not that I know shit about poker, but just from a tactical standpoint, why would you react to ANYTHING another player says about your play?

    I try my utmost to ignore ALL comments about my play, even when it is a compliment from someone whose play I respect.

    There is just no good result that can come from responding in any but the most non-definitive way possible. Sort of like answering a Cop.
  • compueasecompuease Admin
    Milo wrote: »
    , even when it is a compliment from someone whose play I respect.
    someone actually did that? ;)
  • MiloMilo
    Once . . . I think it was a Thursday.
  • DrTyoreDrTyore
    "Ya, I could use another drink"

    (me)

    Mark
  • trigstrigs
    pkrfce9 wrote: »
    plus he's not the kind of guy to ever think he would be wrong. Kind of like trigs.

    wtf? did i upset you for calling you out for not being a benefit to the forum? sorry if that upset you but it has gotten you actually responding and commenting on poker content again here. we're all appreciative of that (even though you are still kind of a dick sometimes with comments like this, but i've had to deal with worse than you i guess).

    EDIT: btw, you do realize that me calling you out for that is pretty much a compliment being that it's suggesting that i think you are good at poker and can help the rest of us if you cared enough to.
  • JohnnieHJohnnieH
    moose wrote: »
    "Leprechauns stole some of my chips."

    Player taking to TD after a tourney break was over at Caesar's LV


    I believe the exact quote was 'I'm not discounting the possibility of Leprechauns'.
  • pkrfce9pkrfce9
    Lolz. +1 for your ability to see the humor

    tapatalk puts this here to annoy YOU
  • trigstrigs
    pkrfce9 wrote: »
    Lolz. +1 for your ability to see the humor

    tapatalk puts this here to annoy YOU

    my bad. sarcasm doesn't translate well in type.
  • BlondeFishBlondeFish
    trigs wrote: »
    my bad. sarcasm doesn't translate well in type.
    It's OK. A couple of members here "are the worst f*cking posters EVER" when it comes to using emoticons to show sarcasm instead of hatred in their text.
    ;) <== note sarcasm
  • BfillmaffBfillmaff
    My favourite one is "fucking guy chasing his gutshot, nice one" after I call a turn bet getting 5-1, hit, and get the whole stack in on the river. They'll never learn and I don't mind. :)

    But regarding the comment in the OP... totally unacceptable to tell a bad player that he's playing bad - and 10x worse if you're a dick about it. Aside from fun games with friends, all questionable plays go into the memory banks for future use, not a word to the table!
  • AcidJoeAcidJoe
    My favourite is I made a raise in late position with suited connectors and got called 2 ways. Checked to me and I bet with a gut shot to try and take down the pot got called by one player. Bingo hit the gut shot checked to me and I bet out, checker raises all in, which I call. After stacking him he goes to you always call a bet with a gut shot? I said only when I know it's going to hit......

    Never called a bet with it but I bet out with it when checked to me. Buddy flopped two pair and slow played it to the point of losing.... To this day he tells people I call bets with gut shots and always hit.... love it.
  • compueasecompuease Admin
    lol, nice one Joe. I remember doing something similar at the friday night Cambridge bingo fest, raised my 5,7 suited in late position, flop came giving me both a gut shot straight and flush draw. Not sure but think I had 2 callers after the flop. Turn makes me a straight flush (my only one in a live cash game that I can recall), also giving one guy the nut flush. You know what happened next. Well I heard about that for the next few Fridays. The story kept changing week by week, effectively by the end I had been calling massive bets all the way to the river before hitting. Funny how people only remember what they want to believe.
  • BlondeFishBlondeFish
    AcidJoe wrote: »
    Buddy flopped two pair and slow played it to the point of losing.... To this day he tells people I call bets with gut shots and always hit....
    You are the luckiest f*cking poker player EVER!
  • ddmilcanddmilcan
    Milo wrote: »
    Once . . . I think it was a Thursday.

    cuz...
    I don't remember that!



    Milton Slim
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