I have to be honest. This gives me anxiety and makes me feel sorry for you.
I know we have never met but I would like to believe your TIME on this great earth could be better spent on other things other than chasing some poker dream 2$ at a time. You could literally make more money looking under couch cushions.
As preachy as it sounds, I think the best course of action is for you to insta-ban yourself on all the online card rooms and get your life in order. You've been chasing these flops since I joined this site and you are not any further ahead.
You said previously that you need to find work because times are tough. THAT sounds like a good idea. Volunteer somewhere. Get out and clear your mind. Doors will open for you that you previously didn't know existed - real opportunities. None of this will happen if you keep part of yourself attached to a big score belief.
Some people are probably going to hammer me for this, but I meant it with the greatest sincerity. There is no future in what your doing.
Be strong.
I would rather follow your new thread on how you turned your life around report in 'other topics.'
-Mike
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